Our Voice You Can Learn to Be Heard by Louise Roke
As Sally Prosser (voice coach) said in one of my recent podcasts Your Voice Speaks Volumes; we spend most of our time worrying about how people see us but not how they hear us; how true!
Sally points out that voice is such an important tool of the job and most people are flying blind and haven’t given it consideration. How do people say what they want to say in meetings some people don’t know and feel that they aren’t listened to. She started her businesses by realising that so many people don’t have basic communication skills to voice what they really want.
Content of course is massive to what you say but what about confidence to get out and write your own plot. Sally mentions Shakespeare how the plot was changed so how good is the message if the messenger doesn’t arrive.
I believe that people who haven’t been nurtured to use their voice it can turn into a frustrating scenario and can turn to anger as they didn’t know how to communicate.
Babies have natural voice so somehow we bottle it up. This is from other people shutting us down. Our noises start off natural and open and confident. Sally and I talk about things that happen to us throughout our life that makes us literally suppress ourselves. She gives an example of a client when he was a small child who remembers when they put their hand up to answer a question the teacher rubbishing him in front of others when the answer was wrong and then topping it off with the saying “Better to say nothing than to speak up and to sound the fool.” Repeat that message to someone over a few times and it takes its toll.
I was absolutely mind blown the other day when I saw a lady on the bus with a very small child of about 15 months. The child was trying to engage with people and she constantly got her mobile phone and diverted her attention back to looking at that and ensuring she didn’t make any noise or make contact with anyone at all. It was heartbreaking actually.
Only the last few years it has changed from the iron rule to speak and not be heard, talk when spoken too, be quiet, don’t talk, don’t sing… it goes on. Now the tablet and phones are becoming babysitters and the mind can become numb. Some children probably aren’t even engaging in conversation.
I also remember how my maths teacher used to wrap my fingers literally with a ruler and I was not up to his mean manner and was failing his extended maths program… thus me ending up terrible at maths and having much anxiety about it. Finding your voice really is life changing; I believe that is why so many people are suffering stress as there are things that have happened, things they are suppressing and ultimately to keep doing this it has to have an effect on your health.
I started this podcast as I wanted to have a voice again. Sally mentions voice health as well which is a thing to bear in mind. It’s fabulous that there are people out there who can guide you to do this or you can practice yourself to become more conscious of voicing what you want, what you mean to be heard; because we all matter in this world. As Sally says your body is your instrument.
Everyone can improve their voice and this can in turn improve your life on so many levels.
Next time you think this isn’t for you; Sally says “Unless you’ve sworn to a lifetime of silence… then it certainly is!”